cremation services provided in Warrensville Heights, OH

When Grief is Too Much

Grief resources are among the cremation services provided in Warrensville Heights, OH. When a loved one dies, intense grief and mourning are the natural human emotions that are evoked. When they are expressed and processed in a safe and supportive environment, healing occurs as the nature of grief is transformed into memories and the hope of seeing our loved ones again.

However, some people believe that showing grief makes them look weak, which, in turn makes them feel more vulnerable. And when people feel vulnerable, they can also feel powerless.

The Western world has indoctrinated us with the idea that we can’t show emotions because they will leave us exposed as a target for bullying, derision, and even potential violence. Therefore, we’re taught at an early age to hide our emotions and our feelings and act as though we don’t have them.

Boys are taught at a very early age not to cry. When they fall down and skin their knees or get a few bumps and bruises, they’re told, “Buck up and take it like a man.” If they do cry, they are often called sissies or crybabies, something no boy ever wants to hear. This indoctrination is so intense that by the time boys become men, they’ve become very adept at stuffing every emotional reaction deep inside and putting on the stoic face of indifference.

Girls are allowed to cry and get upset when they’re very young. But as they mature, the same limits that are imposed on boys start being applied to them. Women who cry and who express their emotions publicly are held in less regard than women who put on the same stoic face of indifference as men.

However, the intense grief of losing somebody you love makes it very hard to uphold the Western tradition of stoic indifference. Losing somebody that you love hurts deeply. It not only rips your heart out, but it tears your soul in two. Containing that kind of emotion is virtually impossible.

But in some cases, some of us still try to stuff all those emotions down and carry on as if nothing has happened. In men, this is often expressed as silence. They simply don’t talk about it. In women, this is often expressed as busyness. They simply stay is busy as possible to avoid having to think about or feel grief.

Because grief is an expression of love, trying to contain it, deny it, or avoid it takes a serious toll on us physically, mentally, and emotionally.

The physical toll of suppressing grief manifests itself in health problems. Blood pressure goes up, headaches abound, fatigue nags constantly, stomach issues arise, and sleep often eludes us. This may, in turn, cause us to seek relief in alcohol and drugs, which create more physical health problems.

The mental and emotional toll is immeasurable, and can actually result in severe depression and even suicidal thoughts.

Grief demands our attention. If we choose to ignore it, we do so at our own peril. We are denying a basic part of what makes us human, but all the denial in the world will not make it go away. It’s better to deal with it immediately and reap the benefits of healthy grief processing.

If you’d like to learn about grief resources and cremation services in Warrensville Heights, OH, our compassionate and experienced team at E. F. Boyd & Son Funeral Home is here to help. You can visit us at our funeral home at 25900 Emery Road, Warrensville Heights, OH, or you can call us today at (216) 831-7906.

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