The Food of Grief

There is a whole range of cremation services offered in Shaker Heights, OH. While feeding you after the death of a loved one is not one of them, friends, neighbors, and family members will make sure to bring plenty of food designed to bring you and your family comfort in your loss.

Comfort food looks different in different parts of the country. In the South, comfort food includes things like fried chicken, mashed potatoes, macaroni and cheese, potato salad, green beans, biscuits, gravy, and pies and cakes. In the North, comfort food is often based on the family’s country of origin, so it will look different from country to country.

In the Midwest, comfort food is often based around meat and potato dishes, with cakes (not pies) being the staple for dessert. And, in the West, the kind of comfort food that is delivered is, like the North, based on countries of origin.

But there is a commonality about comfort food: it is often laden with fat, salt, and sugar. These three basic food ingredients give us pleasure (which is why so much of the processed and fast food in the United States contains one or more of them). And, although eating foods like this once in a while and in moderation is okay, a steady diet of it can be very damaging to our health, especially when we are going through the grieving process.

So, while you may indulge in these kinds of comfort foods in the immediate days after your loved one dies, you need to be more careful about what you consume after that.

Grief takes a lot out of you emotionally, physically, and mentally. It brings an emptiness that accompanies loss and a craving for something that will never be again. We often fill these kinds of emotions with food, and the most satisfying foods for these kinds of emotions are comfort foods.

However good comfort food may taste, it is not particularly good for getting us healthily through grief. The energy boost, for example, of lots of sugar and caffeine feels really good while it lasts, but when it wears off, the crash is very damaging to your body.

So, what is the food of grief? What works best?

The general recommendation about the best food of grief is that it is fresh and based on whole grains, vegetables, fruit, nuts, good fats (like avocados and olive oil, among others), and protein.

If for example, you’re trying to stick to a diet that contains low net carbohydrates (to control diabetes), then you’ll want to look for grains or nuts that don’t elevate your glycemic index.

If you are hypertensive, then you’ll want to look for ways to give your food lots of flavor without a high sodium content. A great alternative to using salt, especially when preparing vegetables or salads, is lemon juice. The acidity of lemon juice gives it almost the same taste profile of salt, so you can have the flavor without the sodium.

While you may not feel like cooking immediately after your loved one dies, consider trying new cuisines when you are ready. Some of the most delicious food in the world is also very good for grief. Consider the cuisines of India, Morocco, Turkey, and Greece for starters. All of these cuisines use a lot of spices to create their signature flavors, but they use healthy and fresh ingredients as their foundation.

For more information about cremation services in Shaker Heights, OH, our compassionate and experienced team at E. F. Boyd & Son Funeral Home is here to help.

Letting People Know Your Loved One Has Died

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One thing that funeral homes in Shaker Heights, OH will help you with is letting people know that your loved one has died. They will do this in the form of an obituary. However, your loved one’s obituary may not appear until several days after their death, so you still have the task of letting some people know immediately that they’ve died.

When a loved one dies, there is a hierarchy of immediacy in letting people know that they’ve died. Immediate family members who aren’t present when they die and close friends are the first groups who need to know. Next, you’ll want to let other family members, casual friends, and their employer (if your loved one was still working) know. Finally, you can announce it generally to everyone.

You don’t do all these notifications on the day your loved one dies. Immediate family members and close friends should be the only notifications you do on that day. If you have people who can help you with these notifications, it will be easier for everyone all the way around.

How do you notify immediate family members and close friends? Traditional funeral etiquette says that you should notify them with a phone call, but that may not be possible or feasible.

While sending text messages and emails are still considered to be impersonal ways of letting people know that your loved one has died, they may be your best option for a very important reason. It is unlikely that you’re going to feel like talking or even be able to talk very much immediately after your loved one dies.

If you make a phone call, one of the questions that you will be asked is “How are you doing?” The truth is you don’t know and you may just sit on the phone and cry. This is not only uncomfortable, but it also can be exhausting if you have to do it with several people in a row.

There are a few phone calls you will have to make because you have to. You’ll know who those people are. But, to control your end of the conversation without having to expend a lot of energy, you can send text messages or emails to everyone else.

Be sure to send text messages individually or to group email by blind copying all the recipients of the email. Not only does this protect everyone’s privacy, but it also gives a more personal touch to your notification about your loved one’s death.

Once you’ve sent the text messages or emails, you may have some people call right away or text or email back right away. You don’t have to answer right away. Put the phone away and take care of what needs to be done with your loved one and the funeral home and yourself and your family.

You can assign immediate family members to do the rest of the family, casual friend, and employer notifications. If your loved one has died on the weekend, their employer’s HR department should be called when the business opens on Monday morning (unless they work for a business that’s open 7 days a week). Be sure to ask about any pay that may be owed, benefits available, and any life insurance your loved one may have had.

Once the funeral home has the obituary published, then you can share that through email or social media with everyone else (do not share the news of someone else’s loved one’s death on social media until a member of the family has done so).

If you’d like to learn more about death notifications at funeral homes in Shaker Heights, OH, our compassionate and experienced team at E. F. Boyd & Son Funeral Home is here to help.

Expressing Grief

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After cremation services in Warrensville Heights, OH, you and your family will feel the full weight of the grief that’s been in the background since your loved one died come upon you as you now face the future without them.

Grief is gut-wrenching and grief is heart-wrenching. But not all people have a capacity for openly expressing their grief, nor do people who openly express their grief always know exactly what it is at that moment that is causing them so much pain.

Grief is complex. Grief is not a single thing, made up of a single emotion. Instead, grief is a rich blend of love, sorrow, happiness, memories, regrets, wishes, dreams, and unknowns in the future that you have to sort and work your way through.

Grief can be very intense in the beginning. If you’re feeling overwhelmed with your grief over the loss of a loved one, you may want to seek grief support.

This might be in a virtual support group made of people who are experiencing the same kind of grief you are (widows or widowers, parents who have lost children, or children who have lost parents, for example).

Grief support groups are intended to be safe places where people who are grieving can talk through and share with others all those facets that make up the grieving process. Some people find it very helpful to know that their experience with grieving is shared by other people, and there can be a lot of comfort and encouragement in this kind of shared grieving.

However, some people either aren’t comfortable talking about their grief in front of others and may feel some shame or guilt because they think that their grief makes them weak. The grieving process does make us vulnerable. We are more sensitive to what people say or do about us when we’re grieving, and we can experience hurt and pain over the remarks and comments, however well-meaning they are, that other people make to us.

In this case, meeting with a grief counselor in a one-on-one setting may be more helpful as we work through the intensity of the grieving process. Grief counselors are professionals who are specifically trained in helping people work their way through grief, so you don’t need to feel shame or weakness in seeking their help.

If talking with someone who is a stranger about your grief feels uncomfortable, then seek out a trusted friend or advisor (such as a church pastor). Church pastors deal with grief a lot as their parishioners die and as they themselves lose friends and family members. Not only do they have firsthand experience at grief counseling, but many of them also have professional training in grief counseling as part of their theological studies.

Some people, though, find they have no language for talking about their grief, at least verbally. The words that express what they are feeling seem elusive when they try to speak about the grief they are experiencing.

This can be very frustrating, and often it leaves the person who is grieving with a sense of deficiency, even though they are wrestling with and struggling with the grieving process internally.

If you find that your grief process looks like this, there is a way that you can express your grief as well. Write it down.

Start a grief journal, either with pen and paper, on the computer, or with a private blog online. This gives you a completely solitary way to work through the tangle of grief without having to form coherent sentences or sound like you’ve got it all together. As you write, those things will come, but at least you have an avenue for expression in the meantime.

For more information about cremation services in Warrensville Heights, OH, our compassionate and experienced team at E. F. Boyd & Son Funeral Home is here to help.

Social Distancing and Virtual Funerals

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Virtual funerals at funeral homes in Warrensville Heights, OH is a product of the current COVID-19 pandemic that has most of America under stay at home orders, unable to attend gatherings with more than 10 people present, and practicing social distancing by keeping at least six feet of distance between us.

COVID-19 has disrupted the funeral traditions and rituals that are designed to help provide us with a safe and comforting space to mourn, surrounded by people who love us, care for us, and encourage us. One of those funeral traditions is the viewing/visitation followed by a funeral service.

Funeral homes are regulated by the same guidelines as the rest of the United States. However, if they allow gatherings of more than 10 people in the funeral home or do not practice and/or enforce proper social distancing rules outside, they can face hefty fines and the potential of losing their license to operate.

However, the current limitations of social distancing can be hard on both the grieving family and the funeral home because the viewing/visitation and funeral service are at the core of the funeral process for funeral homes and are a centerpiece of the beginning of closure for the family who has lost a loved one.

One innovative way that funeral homes are adapting the family visitation ritual is to have a drive-through visitation. The bereaved family will line up outside the funeral home entrance and, one car at a time, mourners can drive up, roll down their windows, and offer their sympathy and condolences at a safe distance from the family.

Some funeral homes have offered video recordings of funeral services or live streamed funeral services for several years. But not all funeral homes have the technology to do these kinds of funeral services.

Families and friends, though, are stepping in to help fill in the gap. With computer applications that allow free live video meetings where anywhere from 50 to 100 people can attend simultaneously or even free live streaming, virtual funerals (and graveside services) are now being held all over the country.

While having a virtual funeral service or graveside service feels different – because it is different – than having a live service with people in attendance, it is better than the alternative of having no service for your deceased loved one.

Many people are opting for virtual funeral or graveside services for their deceased loved ones now, with the plan for a full, attended service in the future when the COVID-19 restrictions are lifted. This might be a great plan for you and your family if you’re saying goodbye to a loved one now.

To hold a virtual funeral or graveside service, all you need is a smartphone, tablet, or laptop and one of these applications to stream the service.

FaceTime is a great application, but it is available only to iPhone users (Android smartphones can’t connect).

For the most connectivity, you have several choices. One of the easiest is Facebook Messenger’s video chat. Up to 50 people can join at a time and you get a private way to virtually share your loved one’s funeral or graveside service.

Although Zoom has reported privacy issues, they are only with recorded videostreaming (and the company is rushing to fix this), not livestreaming. The free version of Zoom allows up to 100 people to attend your virtual funeral or graveside service. The only limitation that may present a problem is that the free version of Zoom has a maximum time limit of 40 minutes.

If you’d like to learn more about virtual funerals at funeral homes in Warrensville Heights, OH, our compassionate and experienced team at E. F. Boyd & Son Funeral Home is here to help.

Talking with Your Family About Cremation Services

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Talking with your family about cremation services in Cleveland, OH will, undoubtedly, be a very difficult conversation. People, in general, are reluctant to talk about death. Talking about death brings not only your mortality into focus but also their own mortality into focus.

In American society, we do everything in our power to avoid facing the inevitable end – death – that we will each come to. Many people, in an effort to cheat death or prolong life, will pursue any and every means of staying alive, no matter what they sacrifice in terms of quality of life.

However, no matter what we do to try to get a few more breaths, eventually, the end – our deaths – will happen. It’s important to plan for this and to make sure that our families know our plans and know that we’ve taken care of the details so that they can grieve and mourn us without extra stress and worry about our final dispositions.

Before you discuss cremation services with your family, you need to have a clear picture of what you want. Cremation services provided by the funeral home include cremations, urns, funeral services or memorial services, among other things.

You’ve decided you want to be cremated. After you decide who your funeral home representative will be, you’ve got a lot of questions to answer.

Do you want a viewing or visitation before you’re cremated? Do you want a funeral service before you’re cremated? If you want a funeral service, what do you want to be included? Who should officiate? What music, readings, and spiritual comfort do you want to be included?

Do you want a memorial service after you’re cremated? What should the memorial service consist of? Where should it be? Who should officiate it? Who should attend (will it be public or private?)?

Do you want your cremation remains stored in an urn? What kind of urn do you want? Do you want some of your cremation remains scattered? Where should they be scattered?

If you choose to have your cremation remains stored in an urn, do you want the urn buried in a cemetery or do you want to be inurned in a columbarium niche?

Are you entitled to funeral military honors? Do you know where your military discharge papers (DD-214) are? Do you want military honors at your funeral or memorial service?

Once you have these details worked out, type it up and store a copy of these instructions with your important papers and print out copies for your family discussion.

The next step is having a conversation with your family. One thing that may surprise you about this conversation is how emotionally charged it may be. Some family members may be adamantly opposed to you being cremated. Some family members may disagree with what you want to be done with your cremation remains. Some family members may be upset that they were not chosen to be your funeral home representative. Some family members may just be so uncomfortable talking about death that they are weepy or angry.

It’s important for you to reassure everybody that you’re having this discussion – and you’ve done this planning – for their benefit when you die. Acknowledge the emotions, but address the concerns behind them. The more you can rationally explain your cremation services planning, the easier it will be to defuse the emotional intensity of the conversation.

For more information about talking with your family about cremation services in Cleveland, OH, our compassionate and experienced team at E. F. Boyd & Son Funeral Home is here to help.

Paying for Funerals

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There are many ways to offset the cost of funerals at funeral homes in Cleveland, OH. Funerals, like everything else in the American economy, cost more now than they used to. However, there are many ways to offset or get help with paying for funerals that you may not be aware of.

The easiest and smartest way to help pay for a funeral is by preplanning. That is something that you can do today to prepare for tomorrow. Preplanning for a funeral – and keeping it affordable – can be done using one of the following methods:

Burial or Funeral Insurance – Burial or funeral insurance policies are designed specifically to pay for funeral expenses. Burial insurance policies are generally small-dollar-amount ($5,000 to $25,000) policies with affordable monthly rates that can be used to pay all your funeral expenses.

These do not require a medical exam, but most of these policies have a period of one to three years of having the burial insurance before payouts will be made.

Life Insurance – Life insurance policies often have a higher dollar value because they’re intended to provide support for survivors after the policyholder dies. A portion of a life insurance policy can be used to pay for funeral expenses.

Life insurance policies always require a medical exam. The premiums for life insurance policies are higher for people who are older and/or who have underlying medical conditions, such as cardiac problems, diabetes, or high blood pressure.

Premiums for whole-life life insurance policies are much higher than for term life insurance policies, but whole-life life insurance policies are in effect until you die, while term life insurance policies must be renewed – with premium increases – every set number of years (usually every 10 years).

Payable-on-Death Bank Account – Payable-on-death bank accounts are an excellent way to set aside funds for your funeral. They are easy to set up and you can designate the funeral home as the beneficiary or one of your surviving family members with the instructions that the funds there are to be used to pay for your funeral expenses. Payable-on-death bank accounts are excluded from probate, so the funds are immediately available to your beneficiary when you die.

If you are in the position of having to pay for the funeral of a loved one who didn’t have a burial insurance policy, a life insurance policy, or a payable-on-death bank account, there are other ways that you can offset their funeral expenses.

One popular method is fundraising. There are many ways that people look for to help a bereaved family and fundraising gives them a tangible way to help out. You can raise funds using several methods:

Car washes, bake sales or auctions – Many members of the community, as well as friends and family, will gladly participate in these fundraising activities, both to help with the fundraising event and to participate by buying what the fundraiser is offering.
Memorial funds – You can set up an account at your bank or at the deceased’s workplace where people can send checks or use a payment system like PayPal to donate funds toward funeral expenses.
Crowdfunding – Crowdfunding sites like GoFundMe.com are specifically designed for things like raising money to pay for funeral expenses. You can easily set up a GoFundMe page for your deceased loved one where people can donate online. Be aware that crowdfunding sites often keep a small percentage of the money that’s raised.
Social media – Social media is a great way to let a large number of people know that you’re raising money for your loved one’s funeral expenses. Be sure, however, to have a payment account like PayPal or a crowdfunding page already set up so that you can give that information in your social media post. Do not include any personal or financial information on social media.

If you’d like to learn more about preplanning funerals at funeral homes in Cleveland, OH, our compassionate and experienced team at E. F. Boyd & Son Funeral Home is here to help. You can visit us at our funeral home at 2165 E 89th St., Cleveland, OH 44106, or you can call us today at (216) 791-0770.

Cremation Memory Items

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Providing cremation memory items is one cremation services offered in Shaker Heights, OH, One of the differences between cremations and burials is that, with burials, you have a physical gravesite with a gravestone to visit, while with cremations, unless you choose to have your loved one inurned in a columbarium niche, you have only their cremation remains to remember them by.

There is something in us that desires something tangible – to touch and to see – of our loved ones after they have died. Cremation memory items provide that when you opt to have your loved one cremated.

There are many different kinds of cremation memory items available from the funeral home. It may surprise you to find out how varied and how personal these items can be in helping to keep the memory of your loved one close to your heart – literally.

One memory item that is becoming popular is a thumbie. A thumbie refers to an impression of a fingerprint, handprint, or footprint taken from your loved one before they are cremated. Handprint and footprint impressions are most often done in memory of small children who have died.

They can be imprinted on pendants or on other types of materials with custom engraving. The pendants can be worn on a necklace, while the custom materials can be displayed in a special place in your home.

Fingerprint impressions are most often done for adult loved ones who’ve died. These are usually imprinted on pendants that you can wear around your neck. The funeral home has options for just your deceased loved one’s fingerprint or multiple fingerprints (popular among spouses, infinity and heart symbols can have both the deceased and the surviving spouse’s fingerprints imprinted as a testimony of their love).

Cremation jewelry is another popular cremation memory item. A small amount of your loved one’s cremation remains are used to make wearable jewelry such as rings, necklaces, and bracelets. There are many different styles and options to choose from, so you will have no problem finding just the right piece of cremation jewelry to honor the memory of your deceased loved one.

The funeral home has a huge selection of urns to keep the cremated remains of your loved one in. If you can imagine it, there’s likely an urn that will satisfy hitting just the right note for the final resting place of your loved one. Urns come in all shapes and sizes, with standard and custom designs that let you create the unique look that is fitting for your deceased loved one.

If you want to divide the cremation remains among family members, keepsake urns are an excellent choice. With this option, the majority of your loved one’s cremation remains are stored in a full-sized urn, while small portions are stored in smaller keepsake urns. It’s an excellent way to share your loved one with those they loved most in life.

The funeral home will take care of storing and sealing the cremation remains, whether you choose a single urn or a full-sized urn with additional keepsake urns. These will be delivered to you by the funeral home. If you have a memorial service shortly after the cremation, the urns will be displayed there, and the funeral home will deliver them to you after the service.

For more information about cremation services in Shaker Heights, OH, our compassionate and experienced team at E. F. Boyd & Son Funeral Home is here to help. You can visit our funeral home at 25900 Emery Road, Warrensville Heights, OH 44123, or you can call us today at (216) 831-7906.

Online Grief Resources

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Funeral homes in Shaker Heights, OH offer many grief resources to family members who have lost a loved within. With deep roots in the community, the funeral home has relationships with grief support groups, grief counselors, and other community-based grief resources.

Grief over the death of a loved one is a normal process that each of us must inevitably experience during our lives. Grieving can be different for everyone. Some people grieve longer than others. Some people grieve harder than others. Some people struggle to know what to do with their grief and how to get past it.

It’s important not to let anyone else tell you that there is a right and wrong way to grieve. There isn’t. It’s also important, though, that if grief feels too heavy to bear on your own or it seems like it will never go away, that you consider getting some additional grief support.

What you may need in grief support is as unique as your grieving process. Some people find talking about their feelings and emotions in a group of grieving people very helpful and therapeutic. Other people struggle to find a vocabulary for their grief and feel uncomfortable talking about personal feelings and experiences in a roomful of people with whom they have no previous connection.

Even with one-on-one grief counseling, some people may find it very easy and helpful, while other people may find it difficult and frustrating. So, be patient with yourself and explore all the resources for grief that are available until you find something that works for you.

Some people prefer online group resources because they can find advice and support without necessarily having to interact with other people. When and if they do interact, they often feel more comfortable in the anonymity of being online instead of being face to face, which can often allow them to be more open and honest in participating.

One of the greatest benefits of online grief resources is that you can, with the click of a mouse to close a browser, “walk away” when you’ve had enough or are overwhelmed without anyone else knowing. And you can go back the same way when you’re feeling emotionally and mentally ready.

Here is a list of online grief resources that you might find helpful in your journey through grief.

Resources for Survivors of Suicide – As the suicide rate continues to climb in the United States, especially among elderly people and middle-aged people, more and more family members are having to deal with the grieving aftermath. Sadly, suicide still carries such a stigma that it can be hard to find in-person grieving resources that provide a safe and comfortable environment for support. This website offers many different types of online resources that you can take advantage of as you work through the grief associated with the suicide of a loved one.
What’s Your Grief? – This website is dedicated to helping people handle all aspects of the grieving process. It has an email subscription feature that delivers weekly articles about grief and it has many online articles and blogs about what grief is, how grief works, and how to navigate the process of grief, especially at highly sensitive times such as death anniversaries, Mother’s and Father’s days, and wedding anniversaries.
National Child Traumatic Stress Network – Children who’ve experienced death through traumatic events, such as friends who’ve been bullied and committed suicide or school shootings, need special care and attention in the wake of these horrific incidents. This website is full of resources that can help.

If you’d like to learn more about grief resources at funeral homes in Shaker Heights, OH, our compassionate and experienced team at E. F. Boyd & Son Funeral Home is here to help.

Famous Last Words

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Cremations are one of the cremation services offered in Warrensville Heights, OH. But before cremations, some people who die speak their last words before they draw their last breath.

A person’s last words before they die can be very interesting. They may be humorous or deep. They may be wise or grief-filled. However, most of these last words never get heard by anyone but the family members who were there to hear them.

Famous people, on the other hand, have plenty of people around to make sure their last words get saved for posterity. Like our private last words that we might say, some of these are funny, some are clever, some are sorrowful, and some are astute.

Just before actor Humphrey Bogart, who won an Oscar for his role in 1951’s “The African Queen,” but is best known for his role in “Casablanca,” died from esophageal cancer in 1957, he uttered these words: “I should never have switched from Scotch to martinis.”

Baseball legend Joe DiMaggio had a brief and tumultuous marriage to actress Marilyn Monroe. However, DiMaggio never stopped loving her, even though they were long divorced when she died in 1962 at the age of 36 from a drug overdose. When DiMaggio died from lung cancer in 1999, his last words were: “Now I get to see Marilyn.”

Actress Joan Crawford played villains onscreen, but she was, by many accounts, quite a villain in real life. When Crawford suffered a heart attack in 1977 that would lead to her death, her housekeeper began to pray for her. Crawford’s last words? “Don’t you dare ask God to help me.”

Actor Jimmy Stewart, best known for his role in the Christmas classic, “It’s a Wonderful Life,” was married to his wife Gloria for 44 years. She preceded him in death. As Stewart was dying in 1997, the last words he spoke to his family were: “I’m going to be with Gloria now.”

The acclaimed poet Dylan Thomas, who is best known for his poem, “Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night,” was a very heavy drinker. His last words, in 1953 before he died of pneumonia at age 39, were reported to be spoken to the desk clerk at the Hotel Chelsea in New York, where he was staying: “I’ve had 18 straight whiskeys…I think that’s the record.”

Author Ernest Hemingway died by his own hand in 1961. Hemingway had always wrestled with bouts of depression, but his physical strength and intellectual prowess managed to get him through the worst of the episodes. However, in 1961, Hemingway was ill and weak and there was nothing to bring him out of his deepening depression. Hemingway’s last words were spoken to his wife Mary before he took his life: “Goodnight, my kitten.”

Poet Emily Dickinson, whose poetry is filled with images of death, kept her last words poetic when she died at age 46 from complications related to hypertension: “I must go in, for the fog is rising.”

Famous whiskey maker Jack Daniel, who died at the age of 65 in 1911 from a bacterial infection in his bloodstream, stayed true to his profession with his last words: “One last drink, please.”

Conrad Hilton, the well-known founder of the Hilton hotel chain, was asked for the last words of wisdom before he died at the age of 30 in 1917. His response? “Leave the shower curtain on the inside of the tub.”

For information about cremation services in Warrensville Heights, OH, our compassionate and experienced team at E. F. Boyd & Son Funeral Home is here to help. You can visit our funeral home at 25900 Emery Road, Warrensville Heights, OH 44123, or you can call us today at (216) 831-7906.

Why We Grieve the Loss of Celebrities

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There may not be many celebrity funerals at funeral homes in Warrensville Heights, OH, but the common phenomenon of how we collectively grieve the loss of celebrities is one that we all participate in at one time or another.

While on the surface, it may not make sense that we grieve the death of someone we have never met and don’t personally know, it turns out that the loss we feel when someone who is famous dies is both real and rational.

When NBA superstar Kobe Bryant and his daughter Gianna were killed in a helicopter crash on January 26, 2020, Americans collectively mourned both their losses. Many Americans may have only known that Kobe Bryant was a good basketball player, having never actually seen him play the game. Other Americans whose interests were not sports-related may have only recognized Kobe Bryant’s name.

Yet the outpouring of grief for the deaths of the 41-year-old professional basketball player and his 13-year-old daughter who showed the promise of becoming a great basketball player in her own right was nationwide.

Why?

It has been suggested that well-known people, who are on display all the time, reveal parts of their inner selves to us – apart from their fame and their talent – and in those revelations, we see parts of ourselves reflected back.

Celebrities are often put on pedestals by the thing they excel at and by us. They seem larger than life. It seems as though they don’t have the everyday things, issues, and problems that we face to contend with.

However, there are always places in their lives where they reveal their similarities to us – their ordinariness and their life challenges – and, it is in those moments that we see their humanness and their likenesses to us. That forms a bond and a connection between them and us.

We feel like we know celebrities by these glimpses into their inner workings, even though we’ve never met them.

So, when celebrities die, we lose a part of our own identities to one degree or another, depending on their impact on our lives.

For example, while America mourned the loss of actor Kirk Douglas on February 5, 2020, some people who were big fans of his movies felt his death more keenly and felt a stronger sense of losing a part of their own identities than people who simply knew he was an actor, but never saw his movies.

Another thing that happens when we lose a celebrity who we felt strongly connected to is that their death represents a loss of a period of our lives when their impact was strongest on us. For example, Baby Boomers might have a bigger sense of loss when one of the music legends of the 1960s or 1970s dies, while Gen Xer’s may have a more profound reaction when a musician from the 1980s or 1990s dies.

So, when we grieve for the deaths of well-known people who made a big impression on our lives, we are also grieving for the loss of the small piece of ourselves that they occupied. And when we grieve the collective loss of celebrities that we knew about, but perhaps did not have much of a connection to, we are participating in communal grief that recognizes the loss of something special.

If you’d like to learn more about grief resources at funeral homes in Warrensville Heights, OH, our compassionate and experienced team at E. F. Boyd & Son Funeral Home is here to help. You can visit us at our funeral home at 25900 Emery Rd., Warrensville Heights, OH 44123, or you can call us today at (216) 831-7906.

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